HAPPY WOMEN’S DAY??

Amongst all the chaos about banning the BBC documentary on India’s Daughter, here’s the day that pays a tribute to the women across the world. Well I ask you, what tribute will you pay to us if you can’t keep a video on air which tries to showcase the atrocities done to women and the cheap mentality of certain men? I’m sorry to say but these so called ‘educated’ men should seriously be sent to school again and taught some moral science. Morals, ethics, values, that’s what India is known for, right? Then tell me which culture teaches men to strip off a women’s clothes, touch her in a wrong way, molest her, rape her? No answers?! Well that’s cause there is no answer. That is where the entire issue is. We all know what the problem is, but there is no solution to this. And I doubt there will ever be a feasible solution to this issue. People will carry on the way. Some might learn a lesson and abstain from doing all this but still there will some father in a corner of the country raping his daughter while the television will be broadcasting news about trails of rapists going on.

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There are two questions I have to all the men in India. Firstly, just because she isn’t family to you, does that give you the right to do whatever you want? Would you keep calm if you saw a man strip off your sister’s or daughter’s clothes and force themselves into her? If yes, then it’s really sad that your mother gave birth to a monster and not a human. I feel sorry for that lady. Well and if no, then don’t stay calm. Walk that extra mile for us, speak up for us and promise us that you will never commit any such heinous act. We don’t need you to protect us, we just need you to help yourselves. Secondly, if you have ever done any such act, retrospect and ask yourself what exactly was going on in your mind when you decided to lay hands on that girl? Did your mind not stop you once? I’m sure it did. Then what was that overpowering emotion that ruled over your thoughts and made you do something that your sub-conscience denied to indulge in? If all men today know the answers to these questions, I guess we would know why these incidents take place so frequently. If not the solution to our major problem, we would at least know the cause for the problem. It’s just like knowing the symptoms before actually deciding the disease and the cure to it.

And do you too think the same
And do you too think the same?

Wait, women’s day is not about all this. It’s about letting all the women around you feel special and I am sure you will do that very well. But we don’t this. Not that we don’t need your love and respect, but we don’t need your hypocrisy for a day. How wonderfully today you will go around wishing all the women in your family and friends and tomorrow you will go on again to be the lechers. Why be such double standard people? And if reading this enrages you, then don’t do such acts that make us fear our entire existence around our opposite gender. I don’t say it’s wrong to check out women cause even we do the same. Yes, there I said it, we do. But then we know that thin line of decency of not going around and pouncing on you just because we got charmed by your looks. And then I guess it’s about knowing your own limits because once again I tell you, ‘We are never asking for it.’ Even if we are drunk, or we wear short dresses, we are not asking for it. Too much of negativity, isn’t it? Let’s put an end to it. This women’s day stop being hypocrites. That’s all I want to ask you to do. I don’t ask you to be preachers, but at the least don’t be lechers too. Please let us live. Please. I request you. Don’t paint this picture for our younger generation.

This women’s day, I dedicate it to all the young girls on the threshold to turn into a woman. I promise you girls, being a woman is the best thing that can ever happen to you. I have seen many girls who get frustrated with the fact they get menstrual cramps and those few days of the month often make them wish they were born as a man. I’m sure every woman has felt the same at some or the point of her life. But isn’t that what makes us complete? Isn’t that what makes us the women we are? But then it isn’t just that. It’s the social norms surrounding this extremely normal biological phase of life that makes us question, ‘why us?’ Don’t go to temples, don’t touch the pickle, don’t sleep on the wooden bed, don’t do this, don’t do that. Why should we not? Do we turn into some alien creatures in those few days we are menstruating? Why are we considered impure just because we are bleeding? Why should we be scared of what people will think if we stain our clothes? Why should we cover the sanitary napkin packets in thousand layers of paper before we can walk out of the store? I wonder if you would do the same to the gold jewellery you buy, after all even that needs to be kept safe right? Obviously you will not. Then why should there be such meaningless rules attached to the most important process in a woman’s body. I’m sure you wouldn’t think twice before calling her names if she is unable to conceive. You will have a problem with that too. Then give me an answer as to what should we do? Why am I even asking you, I know you don’t have any answer.

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And yes, if at any point while reading this you wondered if I felt awkward trying to ask these questions to the world, then yes as a girl born in India, I did. And that’s what needs to change. This women’s day, talk. We can discuss sex in hushed voices and inside closed doors, but the moment we say it out loud in public, we are characterless. Don’t keep shut if they tell you are talking of something that is wrong, because it is not. It is just that embedded thought in our minds which makes us ponder over discussing such topics. If only sex education was a subject in India, and children knew that certain processes are completely natural, and that there is an age for everything, somewhere, someday down the line, situations would change. Ladies, do not be ashamed of bringing up these topics which bother you and speaking openly on such matters. Make men around you comfortable to listen, understand and reply to what you are saying. Take the stand. Don’t sit back thinking if he doesn’t talk about this, probably even I shouldn’t. Maybe even he shares the similar awkwardness. You just need to be the first one to say it and believe me, inhibitions stay only until you do it. It’s not that difficult. Just go for it. India still needs to grow and learn. It’s high time we decide what is right and wrong and fight against social stereotypes. Go ahead ladies, don’t give in and don’t give up. You are born to rule.

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I wish I could talk of more flowery stuff today than draw this picture of women’s day but I think this is what is important. Someone needs to question and I’ll do that for all the women who are scared to do so. I want to question the society as to why have there been such social norms only for women? Why is a woman considered to be best only within the four walls of the house? Why does she need to be cautious every single moment of predators ready to pounce on her the moment she does one small act of carelessness? Isn’t she allowed to make mistakes? Why is the world so partial towards men? It’s so easy for people to say that a woman has a very short lived career, just that they forget to add the fact that it’s only a woman who can make a house a home. It’s only a mother who will not think twice about her own career if her child is at stake. Only she can shower care and love unconditionally. At phase of your lives dear men, you will need us to love you, to care for you, to guide you, to protect you. As your mother, sister, teacher, friend, colleague, wife or daughter, we will always be there right beside you, because the truth is we love you and
we are incomplete without you. Then why can’t we fight together to get rid of all these social stigmas which surround us. Why can’t we put an end to it?

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This women’s day, my dear ladies and gentleman, I request you to let us live. Don’t kill us inside the womb just because we are girls and let boys be born who would later turn into rapists, don’t discriminate between us and our brothers cause one day even he will leave you and go settle abroad and the reason will be career advancement, don’t teach us to sit with our legs put together if you can’t teach your sons to keep their hands to themselves, don’t ask us to wear fully covered clothes because men will still make us feel naked with their disgusting lustful eyes, don’t ask us to come back home once it’s dark if you can’t teach men that a woman out at night is not asking for sex, don’t wish us today if tomorrow you decide to go about being your own old selves. It’s women’s day today and everyday. Happy Women’s Day!

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